A Memory

11 years ago, I was 9 years old. This made my little sister, whom I called Chicken at the time, the perfectly manipulative age of 5. Michele was always a good sport about entertaining my "creative whims."

On one particular summer afternoon, together the chicken, her 7 year old friend, our 4 year old Mutt aptly named Muttly, and myself set out to attempt my most profitable creative whim to date. We were at Mom's house which, at this time, was a mere stone's throw from Dads'. Mom was upstairs, probably watching Braveheart or the Last of the Mohegans (which she always seemed to be doing), and us kids decided it was time to make something of ourselves. With that noble notion, we grabbed an empty pretzel barrel (which were always available as a result of a five kid household and the subsequent necessity to buy in bulk), and Muttly's leash and set forth through the front door and down the empty street.

We walked down to the bottom of Winston and hooked right into a subsection of our village that has houses built very close to one another. With Muttly our protector in hand, the girls and I climbed the stairs or crossed the paths of nearly 30 houses. Our routine was solid, yielding success from the start, so only simple modifications were necessary from house to house. At first, out shtick was, "excuse us- we are collecting money for our school so that they build a new gym." Towards the last few houses, the money was collected still at the school's sponsorship, but varied from helping the homeless/sick/animals/etc. I remember being particularly excited when a young man and his children came to the door and dropped in a crisp 10! Granted, we got a few rejections, but we figured that those people were just obviously evil and would probably pay in hell. Despite the skeptical glances and questions we received, the gang and I came out on top (since there was no risk of coming out under) and ended up with over $50 at the end of it all.
We were just thinking up how to spend our loot (horses, candy, powerwheels) when we recognized the car that was wrapping around the corner. I'm sure I considered running, but I remember Muttly totally selling me out by dragging me towards my mother. Alas, foiled! After gaining wind of what exactly we were doing (besides being outside by ourselves) my mom was considerably enraged. She immediately grabbed our hard earned cash and told us she was donating it to the church. (Still wasn't going to save those cheapos that would be burning.)

I couldn't believe what was happening! Maybe I wasn't the cute, perfect child with the pathetic five cent lemonade stand, but I had made money, damnit! And a lot of it considering the amount of effort I put in. I spent the rest of the afternoon and evening avoiding my money laundering mother at all costs (pun intended), except to tell her how unreasonable she was being.

Later that night, the unspeakable one began preparing a most aromas pot of potato and leek soup. I begrudgingly spoke to her in order to ask when it would be ready. A long day's work had me famished. She told me that I couldn't have any soup until I forgave her and admitted my wrong doings!!

Well, the choice was practically made for me. Mothers have a way like no one else. That night, I went to bed with a clear conscious and a belly full of delicious soup.... only after being coerced into joining my mom in the living room to watch Braveheart.